This Is Not Us.

I was sitting in Kuala Terengganu airport when I read about the protest in Shah Alam. I skimmed through the article quickly. When it was mentioned that a cows’ head had been brought along, I assumed that it was a figure of a cows head. I even went so far to think “that could be a construed as a respectful gesture”. It did not even cross my mind that this type of behaviour was possible in a society such as ours. Perhaps I’m not that bright, or maybe naïve, but either way it would have been nice to have remained that way a little longer.

I landed in KL, and was told by my dad that it was a severed cows’ head. I remained disbelieving till I watched it for myself. Even then I remained numb, not reacting, waiting to see what ensued from this incident.

I was amused when I saw Malaysiakinis headlines were ‘“Don’t blame cowhead protestors” says Hisham’, and the Star blared the headlines ‘“Charge them” says Hisham’. All from the same press conference. Bilateral Bias at its best.

So I watched it myself. That way I could form my own opinion on what he was trying to say. All this benefit-of-the-doubt-giving to a man who has sorely disappointed and offended us all in the past.

Neither of the headlines was what I took away from the press conference. The most striking thing, for me, was when he said

“the organizers, who are sitting on the left and right of me…”

He was sitting with them. How much more of a show of solidarity do you need. A clear message. You who march peacefully, we will teargas and arrest you, child or man. You, who exhibit violence and cruelty as you march, we will sit amongst you, and find a solution.

He sat side-by-side with the leaders of the protest, told us they were ignorant of the cow’s head, told us they simply wanted their opinion heard. He said that bringing the cow’s head was “sensitif’. What does that even mean anymore? Some things are just plain wrong, cruel, disrespectful. Step up, and SAY IT.

Malaysiakini has been asked to take it down because it is provocative. The video is not provocative, the man who is speaking at the press conference is. Aren’t the public the known audience of a press conference. He was speaking to be heard.

The numbness has worn off.

Being hindu, I was hurt. Being Malaysian, I was mortified. Being human, I was disgusted.
The racism, the animal cruelty, the disregard and disrespect of religion, the double standards, the politicians who do not understand the depth of our protests…

This is not us. Not for one minute do I believe this is Malaysia.

We are muslims who rush to a temple to show their solidarity with their hindu brothers and sisters. http://harismibrahim.wordpress.com/2009/09/07/the-beautiful-malay/ We are academics and professionals who have spent hours of our lives working towards a better Malaysia http://thenutgraph.com, http://www.othermalaysia.org/, http://malikimtiaz.blogspot.com/. We are patriots who are now forced to live away from our homeland http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5pbZNCjoQE. We are gay men and women, and transsexuals, empowered to celebrate our sexuality http://star-ecentral.com/services/sprinterfriendly.asp?file=/2009/8/23/soundnstage/4563501&sec=soundnstage

We are passionate young men and women who write, direct, and create art in the name of learning who we were, who we are, and who we can become. http://15malaysia.com/, http://10tahun.blogspot.com/

We are pretty awesome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r27Fbx4Crg8\

This is not us.

undisputed

it moves me to poetry
my misunderstood malaysia
the mist among the highlands
i never needed to know where it came from
if i have to leavei want to take with me, a piece
a piece, of undisputed belonging
we will be inseperable
leading each other home
i remember how the grey and white
of the early morning
turned into the greens of the day
but the mist remained
it was always there- still, constant, undisputed.

Rainbow Massacre

Like many Annexy (or Annexy Sexy, as one of tonights shows co-hosts put it) events, I had no idea what I was in for when I booked my tickets for Rainbow Massacre. And once again, I was invigorated and impressed with the talent we have in our country.

To begin with the co-hosts were funny and spontaneous, with their own brand of sophistication (and I need this, being the hippie-yuppie I am). The acts ranged from Bohemian Rhapsody to original songs by Malaysian artists, all surrounding the theme of liberation, being comfortable with oneself, and being able to be comfortable with oneself. Again our young Malaysians impressed me with their combination of comedic and musical talents, all the while in regards to a serious and relevant topic.

My favourite part of the night was at the end when we all were given the lyrics to Sejahtera Malaysia and asked to sing along. One friend of mine agreed that we have never felt so moved by the song. I was surprised that such a mainstream song was chosen, but I understood later that we needed something we all had in common, and in such a diverse crowd (in so many ways) we really only had one thing for sure. Being Malaysian.To quote Sheila, one of the co-hosts “1Malaysia, 2Malaysia, 3Malaysia, its better than no Malaysia!”

I have a particular attachment to the song. Before I left to study in Australia, I remember listening to it and thinking about my beautiful, perfect, multicultural country and melodramatically crying at the thought of leaving. As I grew up and read more, my perfect world soon started to fall down around me. I realized I had just bought into the whole farce, and the layers underneath were complex and unjust. Tonight as we all sang together, truly regardless of race, religion, and sexuality, I felt I got a very real piece of my perfect world back.